This made me laugh, the joys of long dog ownership!
Just be glad it was only the butter that the dog ate - our retrievers when I was young used to eat anything and everything, no matter how disgusting it was.
Remind to tell you the story of our bedlington who drank a basin of melted goose fat. It has an explosive ending.
Shoot the f@<§1$& dog!Fetch a bin liner!(It's blank verse)
I had a dog who ate vaseline.Afterwards, much work to clean.(a true story)At least my cats only try to steal thing like pork chops and pizza slices.
You dare not leave a bacon sandwich around in my parents house.. Otherwise it would is disappear!
The first time we knew that Zeppo could reach the table as a puppy was on Christmas Day, when he made off with a drumstick from my plate...
I've a dog that can use her nose to push a chair across the kitchen floor, then get up on the chair, climb onto the counter top and get anything she wants. She took a whole ham one day!
Some friends of ours own a Staffy called Max. Max doesn't understand the concept of fetching the stick and dropping it at your feet so that he can fetch it again. If you try and take the stick, he snarls and redoubles his grip. He then eats the stick.